As I move into the third trimester of pregnancy, I find myself engaging consciously with change and transition: the obvious physical changes and the not so obvious emotional changes. First trimester, I experienced sciatica pain for the first time in my life. Second trimester, it eased up and today, I found myself once again in dialogue with this pain. The vulnerability of this pain coupled with my own concerns as I move deeper into pregnancy, brought me to tears this morning. I continuously find the experience of mamahood to be new and transformative. The ways I show up and feel through this time are often not what I would have anticipated. The needs I have of my husband, my sisters and my parents require me to be more communicative and vulnerable.
My intention for today was to allow softness, and to my surprise, it came as I exited the elevator on campus towards my office. I allowed myself to be soft. I allowed myself to be vulnerable. I reminded myself that I am safe. I reminded myself that all is well in my world.
I wonder, where are the spaces that you could allow yourself to be soft, to be vulnerable? Where are your personal edges in feeling safe and seen? What do you need that you have felt too afraid to ask of others?