slow down

When you know what feels good for you ...

When you know what feels good for you, it’s time to do it.

In speaking with one of my clients, we reflected on her fall and planning for the spring. We discussed unhealthy practices and habits that had developed last year and changes that she was seeking to make this year.

As we spoke, she struggled to see how she could balance fun and be focused on her work. She reflected on feeling overwhelmed and the need to unwind which often led to choices that did not serve her well. She thought about the friends and community members who promoted more of her healthy habits and those that promoted more of her unrestricted & unhealthy habits.

But … when we talked about the good moments last fall she led the sharing with “I had time to reflect …” So I highlighted for her, “You realize that for each of the moments where you felt good, you had time with yourself and time in meaningful solitude. Can you cultivate that time every day? Even 5 minutes to be with yourself?”

It’s so easy, isn’t it, to gloss over what really serves us? It’s easy to forget what helped us to make wise choices for ourselves and to feel reconnected with our internal compass. She reminded me of the need for quiet reflection, which also works for me, but mostly she reminded me of how important it is for us to take time and look at our lives, asking ourselves “what felt good for me and why?” And then, when we hear the answer, actually making time to do it.

Slowing Down Shifting Identities

It's December 20th, 2016, one day before we head into winter season here in Ithaca.  As this year wraps up, I'm thinking about change and new identities I have been called to embrace.  This year brought big changes in where my husband and I live, where we work and the expectation of a new family member.  While there is much joy and celebration within those life changes, the newness demands more of us than our regular routines in our old home of Brooklyn, NY.  We are building a new life, and within that new life, we have to adapt to how our identities have changed, acknowledge who we have become and who we are becoming.  I think change can be so subtle. It can impact my well being in seemingly minor ways until one day I find myself spent: craving pizza, comfies, netflix and down time.  These are good signs that I am on the verge of a burn out. Ultimately, I am approaching this winter as an opportunity to listen to my needs, not always easy for me especially during the holidays, and slow down the speed of the changes I have been experiencing.  Slow down to try and catch up with myself.  Slow down and catch up with all of my many selves.